Thursday, April 23, 2009

The Royal Society of Crapters

I’d always been told if you work hard you can do anything … well when it comes to making beautiful craft projects and myself it’s simply not true. That’s why when I happened across a tattered, water spotted pamphlet in an East Village junk shop titled The Royal Society of Crapters ™ by Lucretia Mullberry, I had an epiphany. I would start by own Crapter Chapter. I quickly registered myself as Royal Crapter #1.

What exactly is a crapter? Well, The Royal Society of Crapters charter lists two definitions:

Crapter: (1) A person who indulges themselves in arts and crafts despite having no apparent skills. (2) A pessimistic optimist who begins a craft project with hopeful confidence while knowing deep down in their soul that despite all their hard work it’s going to end up looking like a pile of crapt.

Those definitions fit me perfectly and I hope they fit some of you as well.

So I hope you come with me as I begin my journey of crapting. I will choose enticing projects from various books, periodicals and web sites and follow the artist’s instructions to make the intended project. I want to see if I can succeed in making something beautiful or if I will fail and make a piece of crapt.

If you are so inspired, you may join the society. My goal is world domination. Before you can join you must agree to two RSOC bylaws.

One, you must make your own crown, which you may crapt anyway you so chose (I haven’t gotten around to making mine yet but that is one of the perks of being registered as #1).

And two you must agree to never be ashamed of your crapt projects, display them boldly, talk about them abundantly and if you are truly brave give them away as birthday, Christmas, Hanukkah, whatever presents. After all, nothing shows your love for others than giving them a piece of crapt that comes straight from your heart.

And so let the journey begin …

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